Posted on February 10, 2023.

So many of us wonder why we are not happy, in a great relationship, successful or living the life of our dreams. The answer lies within you. Yes, YOU! Everything that happens in your life is the result of your thoughts, beliefs, choices, and actions. You, are the magnet that attracts it all. The good, bad and the ugly. You have the power to create the life you want to live, but it does take a desire to want to change. I mean a real, I'm going to do it no matter what desire. A Can't Stop, Won't Stop mindset! Yes, mindset, you have to change your mindset, to get the life you want. Along with the mindset change, is ACTION!

One of my coaches, Dr. Stacey, says, "Action Action Despite the Distraction!" You have to keep moving in the way of your dreams. You have to stay focused. You have to desire the change, the success, the new you so much, that despite any distractions, you get back up and get moving towards your goal. Unapologetically!

So, what do you really want? Do you want to continue on the same old path or to chart a new one? Here are some ways to inspire and move you in the direction of your dreams. From surviving to thriving. To getting stuff done. To checking off a accomplishments each day. To saying less and doing more.

To living in a state of gratitude and happiness, just because. Forget surviving, let's get out there and live the life of our dreams.

1. Practice daily GRATITUDE - "Wake up with an attitude of gratitude." Maya Angelou Before getting out of bed say, “ Thank you” for at least 10 things in your life. Repeat this act before falling asleep each night. Be in gratitude during the day, by saying "Thank You" often. Gratitude is your permission to be happy. It opens doors for more good. You simply cannot be unhappy, when you are living in gratitude. Remember the old adage, like attracts like.
2. Learn to LOVE YOURSELF - Do you really love you? How do you treat yourself? How do you allow others to treat you? Do you break promises to yourself? Do you treat yourself like you love you? How do you treat a lover, a friend, or your child? How would your treat a little innocent baby? That's how you should treat you! With love and care. You must begin to love, protect, cuddle, care for, exercise, educate, stimulate, entertain, and pamper YOU! Only you can give YOU the best life. Loving you isn't about what's on the outside, it's about your inner game. Your mindset and beliefs. How you really feel about you, shows in how you treat yourself, others and how you allow others to treat you. Surround yourself with people and things that make you happy. Smile often. See the beauty all around you. Honor and take care of your temple. Get out in nature. Find the positive in everything instead of the negative. Be optimistic instead of pessimistic. Ask for HELP, if you don't know how! Everyday, repeat these statements to yourself (20 or more times during the day): Your_Name, I love you. I really really love you. Name, I love you. I love you. I deserve the best and I accept the best now. Create other love affirmations and say them often.
3. Make better CHOICES - Everything that happens in your life is the result of your thoughts, beliefs, choices, decisions, and actions. YOU are responsible for your life. Period! Only you. Your thoughts and beliefs determine your choices. Examine the thoughts you keep. Are they positive, progressive, loving, kind, optimistic? Are they negative, ungrateful, fearful, envious, mean spirited, unkind, and pessimistic? Then think about your life. Is there a correlation? You deserve the best in life, but if you find that you always feel that you got the short stick, examine the thoughts. Take responsibility for them, and change them , now. Look in the mirror and repeat: Only good things happen in my life. I am ready to change for the better! I make awesome choices. I can do anything I put my mind to doing. Don't beat yourself up about past choices. Begin today to choose you.
4. HONOR your inner soul and spirit. Make time to feed your Spirit. Read, listen to and watch inspiring things. Filling your mind with inspirational things feeds your soul. Taking time to allow Spirit in, feeds your soul. Prayer taking time to talk to God, brings you closer to love. Let love in. Be more loving, kind and compassionate to yourself and others. Do something for someone else, without them asking or you announcing. Be the love you seek. Think about things that make you happy. Try to see people as their spiritual selves and not the earthly beings that are hurt, in pain, filled with beliefs and stories that are not true. We are all on a journey, and everyone is not on the same at the same level of growth. Don't expect them to be. You be the best example of love you can.
5. BREATHE. Take a breather. Breathe deeply four to five times, and then be still and quiet. Take time for some type of exercise: walk, dance, plank or do some other exercise, until you are breathing heavy. Get your heart rate up at least 4 times a week. Get your endorphins up and raise your serotonin levels naturally. MOVE.
6. BE PRESENT. Are you aware of what's going on around you? Do you listen when people are talking? Do you allow people to be themselves at any given moment? Do you seek to understand first and then be understood? Take your time, don’t react so quickly. Pause and allow yourself to be present. Before responding or reacting, ask yourself one or more of these questions: Is this important to me? Is this my business? Why? How can I help this person? How can I best help myself?
7. CONTROL YOUR EMOTIONS and ego. Get in touch with your emotions. Ask yourself why you are feeling and responding in this way? Is this important to you, or is it a habitual response? Are these emotions triggered by actions from my past? When you can identify your emotions, you will be able to understand them and control them. Some work may need to be done in order to nullify the effects, but you can do it. With practice, the old negative feelings won't effect you the same. When you learn to forgive and release the old, you’ll then be in control of your life.
8. TRUST yourself – We all have an inner guidance system, it’s called intuition. Start taking time to listen and feel yours. The more you meditate the easier it is to tune in to your inner guidance system. It's always there, especially when you ask for help. Pay attention to your gut. The body doesn't lie. Start trusting your Intuition, go within for answers, and take action when you get ideas, creative genius or a positive impulse to do something.
9. STOP Judging, Criticizing and Hating - Repeat to yourself, I am worthy! I am my own hero! I can do anything I put my mind to doing. Or make up your own. Judging, criticizing, and condemning yourself and others, points to something that missing in you. These acts drain positive energy and repeals your good. Answer these questions: Why do I feel compelled to judge? What or who am I hiding from? What’s missing in my life? What do I need to change or do? Is this really true? Does this have anything to do with me? Does judging make me feel good? Be about your business and you won't have time to judge others.
10. FORGIVE & LET GO - If you are holding on to old hurts, "Forgive and be FREE!" Forgiveness is for you, not them. Forgive, forgive, forgive 70x7. Let it go. Whatever it is is not serving you, it's hurting you. Most times the other person doesn't know they hurt you or they don't care. Hurt people, hurt people. Whether it was your parent, grandparent, caretaker, friend, lover, sibling, etc. Hurt people, hurt people. Don't be a hurt person. Let it go by forgiving and moving on. Your anger, hurt, pain is only hurting you. One of the biggest hindrance to success and happiness is living in the past. Believing that your past determines your future. Or, allowing your past to be your excuse for not believing in yourself or not being happy or not being able to be or do something. You are not your past! Repeat after me, I am NOT my past. I am NOT my past! The past is over, today I am here to live the life of my dreams. I am not my past. You have showed up, survived, did the work and are now thriving. Stop being afraid of the past. Let it go and move past your fear. The past is HIS-TORY. Don't let it be your now story. Everything you want is on the other side of your fears.

Now hear this! Dream Killers and Energy Zappers your time is up! I'm talking about people, the past, beliefs, stories, habits and situations that drain your progress, momentum, positivity, creativity, and happiness. Let it all go! Especially, people who kill your dreams. Yes, who ever they are, you don't have to be in their company. These people who bring negative energy, words and actions. These people are not a good fit for you. Stop listening to them. Stop allowing their negativity to influence your life. LET THEM GO. CHOOSE YOU! ​BONUS TIPS

1. SURROUND yourself with happy, productive, successful people. Your future is determined by the people you spend the most time around. People who are unhappy, pessimistic, or refuse to grow (spiritually, emotionally or intellectually) are not thriving, they are surviving. Surround yourself with people you admire, people who are thriving.
2. Be in ACTION. Work towards your goals, dreams, and intentions each day. Do something that makes you feel you are working towards your dreams. Take big, bold steps towards your dreams! Be unapologetic about what you desire and stay focused on it. Visualize it daily, see yourself living the life of your dreams.

In your journal answer the following questions:

Am I happy? Why or why not?

Am I living the life I desire? Why or why not?

What do I want? Why? Why don’t I have it?

Am I being afraid, procrastinating, or making excuses? Am I playing small? Why?

Do I allow others to treat me less than I deserve? Why?

Do I feel unworthy, less than, or not good enough? Why?

Do I break promises to myself? To others? Why?